Life sometimes throws us major upheavals. Perhaps it feels like you are in the middle of one now. I know people who recently endured unprecedented damage from a hurricane, only to face another a week later. Others find themselves navigating a series of personal or professional crises that feel similarly relentless. Whether it’s a natural disaster, a devastating election outcome, the unexpected end of a relationship, health news you never imagined, a job loss, or other seismic change, navigating major shifts can challenge us mentally and emotionally. Here are a few reminders to help us move forward through these seismic changes.
1. Feel Your Emotions
I noticed again this week, that in tough moments, I am tempted to skip over the hard emotions and jump straight to action. But we can’t simply bypass our emotions. If we don’t feel our feelings, they find a way to be felt – often in the most inconvenient times and in harmful ways.
Ask yourself: What are healthy ways for you to process emotions? Are there unhealthy outlets you should avoid?
Emotions are called “feelings” because we experience them physically. Take a moment to connect with your body. Where are you feeling these emotions? By directing your attention to these sensations, you may notice them shift, transform, or fade.
A helpful approach in Buddhist psychology—discussed by Tara Brach and Jack Kornfield—uses the acronym RAIN:
- Recognize – Mindfully notice the experience, thoughts, and emotions without judgment.
- Accept – Allow the difficult emotion to simply be, rather than resisting it.
- Investigate – With compassion, explore what the experience feels like in your body.
- Nurture – Offer yourself compassion, whether it’s a kind word, a hand on your heart, or an imagined embrace.
2. Notice and Manage Your Thoughts
You are not your thoughts, although they can feel all-consuming. Some thoughts are inaccurate stories that feed unmet needs. Others may be accurate but unhelpful. Still, others are patterns that once served us but no longer do. Thoughts can provide clarity and direction, but they can also cloud our perspective.
In my own experience, certain thought patterns can be obstacles to progress. Here are four thoughts that tend to rationalize disengagement and get in our way of moving forward:
- Blame – Shifting fault to others, thinking, “It’s their fault.”
- Helplessness – Feeling that “Nothing I do will make a difference.”
- Self-Righteousness – Concluding that “Nothing they do will matter.”
- Cynicism – Believing that “Nothing anyone does will matter.”
Recognizing these patterns can help us navigate our mental landscape more effectively.
3. Move Forward When Ready
Processing emotions and examining our thoughts is essential, but staying in that space indefinitely can keep us stuck (or avoiding). Action is necessary, but when we’re ready. If we rush forward without working through our inner world, we risk spilling our messiness onto others. Have you ever taken your unprocessed hurt out on others while leading? I have. When we take the time to process, we can approach the world as a clearer, more centered version of ourselves.
Here are the 7 practices I previously shared for moving toward a better tomorrow:
- Accept Reality
- Cultivate Hope
- Imagine Possibilities
- Claim Agency
- Embrace Responsibility
- Take Action
- Reflect for Learning
4. Go at Your Own Pace
Everyone processes challenges differently. Some people may feel ready to move forward after a good conversation or a walk alone, while others may need weeks to work through their emotions. The pace is personal and depends on what each of us is dealing with.
Comparison is the secret to unhappiness. If you’re ready to move forward before others, do so and lead the way. If others are ready before you, resist the urge to rush yourself. Allow space for your own process without procrastinating or pushing too hard.
Navigating seismic changes isn’t easy, but with patience and self-compassion, we can learn to weather these storms and emerge stronger. By feeling, thinking, and moving forward intentionally, we not only help ourselves but also create a more resilient world around us. We need you.
